My Brother's Wife
by mostly a lurker
Summary: Homesteading on the prairie in 1864 is austere, beautiful, and deadly. Can Edward and Bella survive the hardships and flourish? AU/AH EPOV  Originally an entry in the Age of Edward contest, now revised and expanded.
1. Chapter 1: Bitter Harvest

**A/N For those of you who wanted more of this story, you owe thanks to my beta, LJ Summers. Now that I'm posting on Twilighted as well, she encouraged me to revise and expand this tale. (By and large, when my beta says jump, I ask how high, lol. She's the only one that gets away with it, though. ;-D)**

**I hope you enjoy Pioneer Daddyward's adventures!**

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I stood on the top of the rise, my eyes squinting in the bright light. Tall, waving green grass as far as the eye could see in front of me. Behind and below me, the gentle wash of a shallow river lined with scrub brush and trees.

One year. It had been one year since I had seen this land for the first time. A land full of promise. A land that was also harsh and demanding. A lot had happened in those 12 months, more than I had ever dreamed possible.

When we had set out to come to this desolate and lonely place, our spirits were high, buoyed by hopes, dreams, idealistic expectations, and an irrepressible sense of optimism. Emmett was the dreamer, the big thinker, the idea man. I was the practical, nuts and bolts, make-it-happen one. Quiet and thoughtful, a bit shy, and more than happy to let Emmett have the limelight. We'd been inseparable since I was born — an unbreakable alliance — and together we had always been unstoppable. I sighed and looked to the ground at my feet.

"I miss him, Alice. I miss him every minute of every day. I don't know how to do this without him."

I could almost feel her small hand rubbing soothing circles on my back, her head resting on my upper arm. Could almost hear her sweet voice saying, "I know," in a comforting tone. I swore I could smell her in the warm April air. I shook my head to clear it and took a shaky breath.

"I miss you, too," I whispered and gently touched the earth before turning and striding away. I came here almost every day to visit my wife, my children. To both remember and forget why I remained here lost and lonely without them.

~ o ~

Alice had always been my confidante, my spark, my best friend, from the first moment she walked into my life when we were children. I had never imagined my life without her, and now she was gone, never to return, taken from me by a fever in the early winter after we lost Bea to the river.

I had just returned from the nearest town, a three day's hard journey away, making the final trip after the harvest and before the snows came. I had been gone nearly two weeks getting the last of the supplies to see us through the winter. It was a fine day, and I was with Samuel in the fields planning the plowing and planting for spring when Mattie came running and screaming towards us.

"Pa! Pa! Pa!" was all she could manage. She raised her little arm and pointed beyond the house. My stomach fell to my feet. Alice was expecting our next child sometime in the winter and I was immediately afraid something had happened to her or the baby.

I sprinted toward the house, calling for her as I ran. When I got there, the house was empty but I could hear Alice sobbing, and my heart clinched. I ran toward the sounds of her cries and found her crumpled on the riverbank.

I grasped her arms. "Alice, Alice! Sweetheart! What is it? The baby?"

She raised her tear-streaked face, red and swollen with crying. "Bea," was all she said.

I stood and began calling, looking along the bank in panic. "Bea! Where are you, baby? Where's my Busy Bea?" I headed downstream on the bank, still calling, terrified of what I would find. There were so many dangers out here, so many things that could hurt a three-year-old child. My frantic eyes caught sight of something in the water. A bit of fabric caught in a snag. A moan rose from my chest as I recognized the piece of cloth.

"NO, NO, NO!" I tore off my boots as I splashed into the frigid water, swimming as fast as I could to my youngest daughter. When I got there, I knew it was too late. Her body was limp and she bobbed gently in an eddy of the current. "Oh, Bea," I whispered, untangling her waterlogged dress and clutching her body to my chest. "My Busy Bea," I choked out before heading back to the shore.

Samuel had helped his mother to her feet. Mattie was waiting on the bank, holding my boots. In silence, we returned to our sod house where I lay Bea's body on the table carefully. She looked so peaceful — like she was sleeping — but even in her sleep, she had never been so still. Samuel followed me back outside, and we started our separate tasks. I grabbed a shovel, and Sam, a hammer. She was not the first child we'd lost, and I feared she would not be the last.

Alice and I had selected the spot on the rise not long after we arrived. Life was tough on the frontier. Death came easy and swift, just a natural part of things, though it was never easy and was always painful. I had not changed out of my waterlogged clothing, nor stopped to put on my boots. I needed to dig, to turn the earth, to pour my grief into that hole in the ground so I could be strong for Alice, for Sam and Mattie, for the baby to come. I loved all my children, but Bea had a special place in my heart because she was so like Alice.

I wiped the tears from my cheeks and returned to the house. Samuel had finished the box. We had just enough scraps of lumber from building our shelters for this one tiny coffin. It was so small, I felt my heart squeeze when I saw it. Alice had carefully washed and dried Bea's body and dressed her in her best dress. I felt a tear slip down my cheek as I saw her laid out on the table. I picked up the tiny body and gently placed her carefully in the box. Alice fussed briefly over her dress and hair, then Mattie tucked Bea's doll by her side, and Sam added a handful of dried flowers, each of us whispering a goodbye before I nailed on the lid.

I led my family to the grave and placed the box into the earth. Alice read a few Bible passages, and we each shared a favorite story or memory of Bea, telling of our love and sending her soul to God. Alice dropped in the first handful of dirt, waiting for Sam and Mattie to drop in theirs before she took them by the hand and walked back to the house, leaving me alone with my daughter as I tucked her into bed one final time.

It was nearly dark by the time I returned to our warm but clammy sod house. My clothes were still damp, and I was chilled to the bone. Alice had me strip and parked me in front of the fire, handing me a cup of warm soup with a piece of bread for my supper. The mood was understandably somber, the house too quiet without Bea's lively chatter.

When we climbed into bed that night, I pulled Alice to my chest, her back to my front, and holding her tightly. She whimpered quietly into her pillow. "Oh, my darling, I'm _so_ sorry about Bea," I murmured reaching up to stroke her cheek, wiping away the tears I found there.

"Oh, Edward. I'm the one who's sorry. I couldn't find something in the dugout, and suddenly she wasn't with me. I ran out just in time to see her slip and tumble into the water. By the time I got there, the current had taken her too far out into the river. Mattie was running for you before I could say anything..." she let out a muffled sob.

I wrapped my body around hers, giving her my warmth and comfort the best way I could. Words were never my strength; I found it easiest to talk with my actions.

"Shhhh. It's okay." I stroked and caressed Alice tenderly, trying to ease her pain. I rubbed my hand lightly over her swollen belly, reminding us both that new life was coming. It would never replace the life lost, but it gave us something to focus on, to look forward to. I continued touching her gently, holding her close until we fell asleep.

In the morning, I was unusually tired and a bit shaky, but I went out to do my chores with Samuel regardless. I don't remember collapsing in our sod barn, but Sam and Alice had to practically carry me back to the house. I burned with fever for more than three days. Mattie fell next, then Samuel, and finally Alice. Of course, Alice wouldn't stay in bed, trying to nurse us all. On the fourth morning, I woke from my delirium and realized the fever had broken. Mattie's serious eyes met mine as she washed my face with a cool, damp cloth.

"Thank you, baby girl. Are you okay?" I croaked, my voice rusty from lack of use.

"Yes, Papa. I was sick a little, but Ma and Sam are bad."

I turned and jerked myself up onto my elbow to look at Alice next to me in our bed. She was deathly pale, her face glistening with sweat, her nightgown sweat soaked.

"How long has she been like this, baby?"

"Almost as long as you, but she stopped making sounds last night."

"Alice? Alice, sweetheart? Darling? Love? Can you hear me? Please, stay with me now. You have to stay with me — I need you." I smoothed her matted hair away from her face. I took the cloth from Mattie's hand and washed Alice's face tenderly. Her lips were swollen, dry, and cracked. She didn't flutter so much as an eyelash as I tended to her, spoke to her, touched her. If her stillness didn't tell me, the heat of her skin did. It was too late. Though I begged her to stay with me, not to leave, she breathed her last before noon.

Samuel lingered for several days. At one point, it looked like he was going to mend, even sitting by the fire for a bit. But at nightfall, he slipped into a deep delirium and by dawn, he was dead. He had been our oldest, not yet 13.

There was no more wood for coffins. Mattie and I did our best to wash and dress their bodies for burial, and I wrapped each in an old sheet. It wasn't much, but it was the best I could do. I placed their bodies in our dugout until I was strong enough to dig their graves. It was cold now, and I knew I needed to put them to bed before the ground froze and I'd have to wait until spring.

I was hoping Emmett or one of his boys would stop by and help me; and when they didn't, I just assumed they were still busy bringing in the last of their crops. It took me a couple of days in my weakened state, but I finally got both graves dug. Mattie had become my shadow and rarely left my side, doing all she could to nurse me until I was well and strong again. I finally got Alice and Samuel settled into place a week after they'd passed. I put Alice between our children, and said a special prayer for the soul of our unborn child as tears streamed unchecked down my cheeks and I held Mattie close by my side.

As much as I wanted to lose myself in my grief, I couldn't. I had a pair of serious grey eyes that captured me and kept me here. I now had all the farm work to do, as she had all the housework. Mattie was only nine, way too young to shoulder such a burden, but there wasn't anyone else. She was a strong little girl, and while she had always been on the quiet, shy side, she was now positively taciturn.

~ o ~

A few days after the burials, I saddled up one of our horses, Old Jack, and lifted Mattie into the saddle, climbing up after her. It had been too long without contact from Emmett or his family, and it was past time to share my sad news. I needed his help finishing up a few things around my homestead that required at least two strong backs. I was worried that the winter snows would have us trapped inside before I could batten everything down.

The air was cold, with the smell of snow in the sharp wind. I hugged Mattie close to me, taking comfort in the presence of her small body, while trying to keep her warm, not wanting her to catch a chill. We were so very alike in temperament and mood, each worried the other would die and leave us truly alone, it made us protective and cautious.

The familiar ride didn't take long, and I always enjoyed seeing how the land changed across the seasons. I knew something was wrong the minute we were in sight of Emmett's soddy. It was too quiet. No one was in the yard. There was no shout of greeting, no joyful welcome. Only the silence and stillness that accompanies death.

With dread, I climbed out of the saddle and told Mattie to stay put. I didn't know what I'd find, and I didn't want her to see whatever it was. Her eyes were huge in her face. I could feel her fear, and tried to smile to reassure her. I failed.

The house was clean but empty, and I moved on to check the outbuildings. I noticed then the wagon was gone, and felt relief pour through me.

_They were simply out on the farm somewhere, not massacred, not dead_. I let my breath out with a big whoosh. I hadn't realized I had been holding it. Knowing they'd be back soon, I settled Old Jack in the barn while Mattie and I waited in the house.

It wasn't long before I heard the jingle of the wagon. We went out to meet them, but only Bella and Thomas were on the seat, and the wagon itself was empty save a shovel. My heart sank. Instinctively, I pulled Mattie back into me, my arms around her shoulders. Thomas pulled up the team in silence and helped his mother down from the wagon seat.

"Bella," I nodded in greeting. She nodded in return, and entered the house without a word. When I went to follow, Thomas stopped me.

"Uh, I wouldn't right now, if I were you, Uncle Edward," he said.

"What's wrong, Thomas? What's happened?" I could see his eyes were red and swollen from crying. He sighed and looked down, not meeting my eyes.

"I need to get the horses unhitched and bedded down." He turned to his task.

"All right, I'll help you. Mattie, why don't you go in the house and see if Aunt Bella needs help with lunch." I gave her a little push as I could sense her reluctance to leave me.

As soon as she was out of earshot, Thomas told me everything. Not long after Emmett returned from his trip to town, Rose, only a few months old, came down with a stuffy nose. Emmett loved his boys and they roughhoused together, but I knew that deep down, he envied me my girls. He'd always wanted one of his own.

"We all did everything we could, Uncle Edward, but she started coughing, and. . . and," his breath hitched, "and she was gone." His voice dropped down to a whisper and he turned away to rub his eyes with the back of his hand.

Thomas said they were all upset by Rose's death, but Emmett was so torn up by it that even Bella couldn't calm him down. After they buried Rose, Emmett stayed out on the farm late into the night with the twins, Matthew and Mark. Thomas would have, too, but Emmett insisted he go and be with his mother.

Two days later, Emmett, Matthew and Mark were all struck by the grippe.

"Pa refused to stay in bed and went out day after day to do his chores. I. . . I found him in the barn, but I couldn't move him."

I sighed. Emmett was strong as an ox and unused to being ill or physically weak. It was his undoing in the end.

"Matthew and Mark got out of bed to help me drag Pa into the house. He. . . he. . . ." Thomas was openly crying now, "He just stopped breathin' after awhile, Uncle Edward. . . . " His voice trailed off and he swallowed hard.

I put my hand on his shoulder and patted it lightly. When he could draw a steady breath, Thomas finished his sad tale.

Matthew and Mark were set on digging Emmett's grave, and the three boys buried Emmett the next day.

"They'd been getting better, Uncle Edward, but that night they took sick again. . . ." I didn't need to hear what he couldn't bring himself to say.

Thomas had to dig the graves to bury his brothers alone. There was not enough wood for coffins for them, so Bella wrapped the prepared bodies in old sheets, as I had had to do. They were just coming back from burying the twins when Mattie and I greeted them in the yard.

Tending to the horses was comforting to both of us as we shared our unhappy stories of sickness and death. I was shocked, the breath literally knocked out of my body, when I heard of Emmett's death. I couldn't imagine him weak or felled by a fever or illness. My older brother had been larger than life my entire existence, and I didn't understand how I could survive when he didn't.

It was sobering. In a matter of weeks, our large, ever-expanding family had been reduced to just four — Bella, Mattie, Thomas, and me. Winter was coming, the frozen pellets of cold, dry snow beginning to pelt the ground as we crossed to the house. The vow I made to Emmett the night before we left home loomed large in my mind.

"_Edward, promise me that if anything ever happens to me, that you will take care of my Bella for me. I know you love my kids like your own, so I'm not worried about them. But Bella is special. I know you don't agree, and you two don't always get along, but please, for me? She's my wife and I love her with my whole heart. Please take care of her, look after her, keep her safe for me."_

_His eyes were full of tears as he looked at me, begging me to care for his family. Bella and I not getting along was an understatement, but I didn't think I'd ever have to worry about it, figuring if either of us weren't going to make it, it would be me._

"_You know I'll take care of Alice for you like she were my own. She's like a sister to me, man. And your girls... your girls would be safe with me. I would protect them with my life if need be. You know this. I'm only asking you to do the same for me."_

"_Of course I'll take care of your family, your wife, Emmett. You don't even need to ask me that. We're brothers till the end, and I do love your kids like my own. And I promise to do my best by Bella, knowing you'd do the same for Alice."_

He'd wrapped me in a bear hug, tears spilling down his cheeks in gratitude. It had been an unspoken agreement between us since we'd each married, but it clearly eased his mind to hear the words out loud. I'd never dreamed then that I would be honoring that promise so soon.

_How could we ever survive this? How could I keep us all safe in the months and years ahead? I'm the only man for two families. How do I do this?_

I had no idea. I was at sea.

~ o ~

Bella had refused to speak with me that day. She had silently dropped a plate of cornbread and beans in front of me before going to their sleeping area and drawing the privacy curtain. I sighed, and the memory of our first meeting flashed in my mind.

_Walking down the sidewalk as boys, I pushed Emmett and ran being playful and rowdy after school one day. I could hear his footsteps getting closer and I looked over my shoulder to see where he was when I crashed into something warm and soft, causing us both to fall. When I looked up, Emmett had disappeared and a girl was lying facedown in a mud puddle in the street. I couldn't help laughing when she raised her head from the muck, I'd never seen anything the like before. When I went to help her up with a big grin plastered on my face, she angry swatted my hand away calling me a heathen before stomping off with her head held high._

It had only gone downhill from there. I somehow always managed to make some sort of mistake that humiliated her or ruined some piece of her property whenever we ran into each other. I thought it'd get better when Emmett started courting her, or at least after they married, but Bella had a long memory and nursed her grudge at every opportunity. She and Alice got along like a house a fire, and our children grew up together, but it was always plain she just couldn't abide me at all.

Mattie and I went home after lunch, and returned the following afternoon. I helped Thomas with a few things that needed doing, and he promised to come help me the next day. Bella would not come out of the house and disappeared behind the privacy curtain when I went in to speak with her.

"Bella, Thomas is coming to my place tomorrow to help me with a few things. I hope you'll come with him." My words were met with silence. I sighed and left with Mattie.

Thomas came by himself the next few days. At 14, he was bigger, older and stronger than Samuel, which was a big help, but there was more to do on my farm than I realized to finish my winter preparations. On the fourth morning, Thomas didn't come as planned. I was immediately worried, and started out towards Emmett's place. Less than halfway there, I encountered Bella, stomping her way towards mine.

"My son is no longer coming to help you. We have our own farm to run, and he has all the chores he can handle without having to do all of yours, too. You'll just have to make do without him," she spat angrily.

I was stunned into silence, my eyes wide. Our interactions in the past had been disasters, it was true, but we had worked side by side and our families had helped each others for years. I couldn't believe she would say such things to my face.

_That's just the grief talking._

"I know, Bella," I said in a voice meant to calm her. "I've wanted to talk to you about that very thing. If we're going to survive this winter, we have to work together."

"We don't need your help. We can do just fine on our own, thank you very much."

"That's not what I was saying..."

"I don't want to hear it. I've said my piece and I'm going home. You are not welcome on our property."

"But, Bella, I promised Emmett..."

"Don't you _ever_ speak his name to me again. Do you hear me? I've had to put up with you all these years because you were his brother, but now he's gone and I don't _ever_ want to see your face darken my door. Goodbye, Edward." She whirled and started back the direction she'd come.

"But, Bella..."

She whirled back and glared at me fiercely. "_Goodbye_, Edward," she hissed, and left me standing there on my own with my mouth open.

_Emmett, need your help here. She's _your_ wife. I know I promised, but she's forbidden my help. What do you want me to do now?_

In answer, the heavens opened up and rain spilled from the sky.

~ o ~

The days following this encounter found me busy from before light until after dark trying desperately to finish preparing our sod house and barn for winter, laying in enough wood and water, and marking paths to all these places so I could find my way to them and home again should a blizzard blow or the snow drift over my head.

Mattie was busy collecting the dried prairie grass and any lingering nuts or berries she could find. I went hunting every few days, bringing us small game and fowl to butcher and dry. Alice had turned our first shelter, a dugout on the creek bank, into a root cellar to store our food and supplies. I was grateful I didn't have to fortify our stores against plunder by large predators like bears. The smaller raccoons proved to be quite crafty, and I had to be especially inventive to defeat their thieving little hands.

The first major snowfall found us well prepared and reasonably snug in our dirt and grass home. I'd had to fill in the window openings, so it was dark inside, and with a dirt floor and dirt walls, it could only be so clean. But I'd worked hard to seal up all the places water dripped in when it rained, and where the wind blew in, and was pleased with my efforts. It was still cold inside, with frost greeting us every morning, but once the fire was bright in the hearth and the lantern lit, I daresay it was cheerful.

On fine days, I took Mattie out hunting with me or to check the few traps I'd set up. I didn't expect much, and didn't have much luck, but it gave me something constructive to do, and provided fresh meat for us on occasion. When the weather was foul, I focused on Mattie's education, teaching her to read, write, and do basic ciphers. I didn't have much education myself, but, as with everything else, I did the best I could and hoped it was enough.

On Thanksgiving, Mattie dug into our food pantry and prepared a special meal of dried rabbit, with canned peas and potatoes from our garden. For dessert, we shared a small bowl of fruit crumble she'd concocted out of some odds and ends in the root cellar. After I said grace, I cleared my throat and spoke, "As has long been our family tradition, I'll share some things I'm grateful for. I'm grateful for the gift of life, for this food I'm lucky to have, for the grace of my daughter, and the beautiful land we live on."

Mattie surprised me by chiming in. "I'm grateful for Papa, and for Mama watching over us in heaven with Samuel, Mary, Sarah, and Bea. I know there are other little girls out there who are not so lucky as me."

Her words caused a lump in my throat I had to swallow down before I could take the first bite of my supper. As Mattie and I ate in our usual comfortable silence, I wondered how Bella and Thomas were spending the day. Bella was a fine cook, but she was used to the fuss and ruckus of a house full of rowdy boys who ate each meal like it was their last. The quiet along with so few mouths to feed must be painful for her, and I had no doubt that Thomas missed his Pa and older brothers. Like me, he'd always been in the shadow of the twins and I'm sure he was lonely and at sea without them. I was surely lost without my larger-than-life big brother to lean on.

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**A/N: The next chapter will post sometime soon :-)**

**My o/s All That's Left is up for a Vampie Award – voting runs from February 14-28th. To see the full list of nominees and vote, please visit http:/ / vampawards/ ?page_id=294 **(remove spaces)

**In March, the Foxy Fics compilation benefitting The Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson's Research will be available. I've extended my popular o/s I Burn for You Gladly by one chapter especially for this worthy cause. Chapter 2 will ONLY be available in this compilation. There are 48 authors contributing work, including tara sue me, so it's well worth the $5 minimum donation. Go to http:/ .com/ 2010/11/ foxy-fics-round-2. html** (remove spaces) **for all the details.**


	2. Chapter 2: Seeds of Survival

**A/N: Unending thanks to my beta, LJ Summers for her patient tutelage, continued support, unstinting red highlighter, and snarky love. ;-D**

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The snow had settled on the ground for good, and Christmas was only a few days away. I checked on everything almost obsessively, knowing we were bound closely to the house until spring. Every time I looked east, my chest ached, feeling I wasn't honoring the promise I'd made to Emmett. I had slipped onto their land several times to observe from a distance, and all appeared to be well. It wasn't much, but given Bella's rigid refusal, it was all I could do. Now, they would be on their own until the snow melted.

_How do I help someone who refuses my help?_

The next morning, about mid-morning, I thought I heard a voice call out above the howl of the wind.

_That's not possible. I must be hearing things. No one would be abroad in this weather._

I paused and stepped closer to the entrance of the barn, listening carefully.

_There it is again. I swear that's a voice calling._

I stepped out into the whipping wind, and tried to screen my eyes from the blowing snow so I could see. It was hopeless, the swirling snow reduced visibility to only a few feet. But while I was focused on looking, I heard the voice again, a little closer, off to my left, moving past me.

"Uncle Edward!"

"Thomas! Is that you?" I hollered back. "I can't see you! Where are you?"

"I'm here, Uncle Edward! I can't see anything, either."

"Stop, Thomas! Stay where you are. Don't move, just yell!"

"Okay, Uncle Edward!"

I quickly grabbed a rope and tied one end around my waist and the other to the barn door. "Thomas! I'm going to come and get you. I have to follow your voice. Keep shouting!" I started out into the raging wind.

"Papa! No!" It was Mattie standing in the doorway of the house.

"Mattie! Get back inside!"

"No, Papa! Don't leave me!"

"I'll be back, Baby. Don't worry. See, I've tied a rope around my waist. Your cousin Thomas is out there and I have to go get him. Stoke the fire, so we can warm ourselves when we get back. Do it. Now."

She knew that tone of voice brooked no argument and disappeared inside unhappily. I turned into the wind again. Thomas and I shouted back and forth, and I moved closer to him in the blinding whiteness. It seemed to take forever, but I'm sure it was only a few minutes before I saw a dark shape looming in front of me.

"Thomas?"

"Uncle Edward!"

"Come on, son. Let's get you inside. You must be freezing."

I put my arm around his waist and half carried him, reeling us in with the rope around my waist. He was exhausted and shivering violently. I knew he'd been outside, exposed to the bitter cold, too long.

I had him stripped down to his union suit, wrapped in several blankets, with his feet propped up in front of a roaring fire before ten minutes had elapsed. Mattie silently handed him a cup of coffee; and he sat shivering constantly as he tried to speak, "I-i-i-it-t-t. . . ."

"Save your energy, Thomas, until you're warmer. It'll keep." I joined him in front of the blazing fire and Mattie draped me in the only blanket left, then handed me a cup of coffee. I stroked her hair in thanks, and she crawled into my lap. She was really too big for such a thing, but I indulged her, knowing she was frightened and upset.

As his shivers slowed, my exasperation grew and I finally spluttered out, "Thomas, what were you thinking? What are you doing out in this storm?"

He looked into his cup. "It's Ma. She's bad off. She wouldn't let me come, but I didn't know what else to do. I'm sorry, Uncle Edward. I'd have come a long time ago — I know you needed my help on the farm — but she forbade me, and I couldn't disobey her. . . ." His words came out in a rush and his lips trembled.

"I know, son. That's for another time. Tell me what's happened now. You said it's your Ma?"

"Yessir, she took sick a few days ago. I tried to take care of her, but she kept saying she was fine, that I had enough to do without having to nurse her. She could hardly get out of bed yesterday morning, and today, she wouldn't wake up. I didn't know what to do. I panicked, and came to get you. When I started out before light, it wasn't so bad. But the snow got deeper and I left my snow shoes at home, and I floundered a bit. Just as I could see the smoke from your chimney, the wind came up. I knew I was close, so I tried to keep moving in the same direction and I started hollering, hoping you'd hear me."

It was the most anyone had spoke in my house since Alice and the children died. I gaped slightly to hear it, not what he'd said, but simply the volume and quantity.

"Well, I'm glad you were smart enough to shout. You were heading out into the prairie by the looks of things when I found you."

A violent shiver ran through him just then, and I didn't think it was entirely from the cold. We spoke a bit more about his mother and the symptoms of her illness. It was the grippe for sure, and Thomas was clearly out of his mind with worry about her. I sighed and shook my head.

_She's so stubborn; she'd rather die than admit to weakness. She won't even let her own son take care of her when she's sick. How thoughtless. I never did see what Emmett saw in her._

But, I'd promised Emmett, and his son had risked his life to come to me for aid. I couldn't let either of them down.

"I guess we'll have to go get her and bring her back here," I sighed.

"Oh, Uncle Edward, I don't think she'll like that. She probably won't let you do it."

"Well, I won't leave my house and my livestock to tend to her, and I won't send Mattie alone. The only option is for her to come here. That's it. That's all there is to it," I stated flatly.

Neither Thomas nor Mattie argued with me. They both knew better.

~ o ~

By the time the wind died down, Thomas and I were warm and dry, Mattie had fed us all a hearty lunch, and Thomas and I had discussed options for bringing Bella back here. There was no way to take a wagon, the snow was too deep, and we couldn't carry or drag her ourselves, it was too far. I had seen some Indians on one of my hunting excursions in the summer using a sort of sledge behind their horses that dragged on the ground and carried large bundles. I made a crude drawing for Thomas, and we agreed it was our best bet.

Thomas and I went down to the riverbank to hunt for two trees that might serve as poles for our sledge. Mattie didn't like to go down to the river, so she stayed on the crest of the wash watching us. Luckily, we found two trees of roughly equal size almost right away, quickly felled them and stripped them of their branches. Mattie carefully joined us then to help carry the branches back to the house. I'd shown her by example that we couldn't afford to let anything go to waste, and she knew that wood was a valuable resource.

After we harnessed up the horses, I started lashing the poles in place while Thomas scrounged up a smallish piece of canvas and a couple of saddle blankets to tie between our makeshift poles. It didn't look like much, but it held together when Mattie climbed on to try it out. I bundled her up in every blanket we had before setting off for Emmett's. The snow was deep, so Thomas and I walked ahead of the horses, breaking the trail. It was exhausting, slow work and it was past dark by the time we reached their soddy.

As Thomas tended the horses, I went in and checked on Bella. She was still alive, though unconscious, and it appeared she had tried to get up at some point during the day. The fire was out and it was bitterly cold inside their dwelling. Mattie quickly laid and sparked a fire, then rooted around in their stores for food. We all needed a hot drink and something to eat after the long, cold excursion.

I went back out to the barn to help Thomas. Old Jack and Bill had worked hard that day, and I wanted to be sure their feet and legs were okay — no ice packed into their hooves — and give them an extra pat for their effort. Thomas had tended to them carefully and well. He was good with animals, something I hadn't noticed before.

When we returned to the house, the lantern was lit, the fire was blazing cheerfully, the smell of food cooking mouthwatering, and best of all, Mattie had coffee ready and waiting for us with two empty cups warming on the hearth.

"Thank you, sweet baby girl," I murmured into the top of her head, kissing her lightly and stroking her hair. She smiled at me and went back to her cooking.

"It looks like Ma tried to get up," Thomas said from beside the bed. He held his mother's hand in his and stroked her forehead lovingly. "I can't tell if she's cooler or not though." He frowned.

"Come get a cup of coffee, Thomas. Warm yourself by the fire. If your hands are like mine, they're so cold, I'm surprised you can feel anything." I smiled warmly at him. Of all Emmett and Bella's children, he was the one I knew least, lost in the middle of a big family.

After we ate, Mattie dipped a small cup of broth out of the cooking pot. She hesitated before going over to Bella's still form in the bed and looked up at me, her eyes wide. She was afraid of Bella, I knew. I sighed and took the cup from my daughter's hand. Thomas seemed relieved when I didn't hand it to him, but took it myself to the bedside.

"Bella? Bella, you need to drink this. Come now, just a few sips." I propped her up with one hand and held the cup to her lips with the other. When the warm liquid touched her lips, she parted them slightly and allowed me to tip some inside her mouth. In this way, she drank about half the cup without speaking or opening her eyes. She was very weak and lost inside the fever. I laid her back down, and drew the blanket up to her chin before drawing the curtain partway for her privacy.

Thomas, Mattie, and I sat in front of the fire and discussed our options. I wanted to be sure to include Mattie as what was happening – the changes to our households affected everyone. Either way we looked at it, the two households would have to be merged, at least for the time being.

I refused to abandon my land and I wasn't sure I wanted to continue the claim on Emmett's. When we filed our homestead claims, we ceded title to each other in case of death or abandonment because women weren't allowed to own property on their own. Of course, we didn't want to burden our wives with such business, so Bella had no idea she was living on what was now my land.

I would not live under her or any woman's shrewish thumb. Alice and I worked together as a team to run our land and home, but I only knew Bella as an adversary. Living in what she deemed to be her house on her property was out of the question. It didn't matter that she had no real rights of any kind, I knew how Emmett had indulged her and let her rule his roost. I would never abide that myself, and I refused to subject Mattie to her tyranny. I knew it would be hard enough for Bella to have to heed my rules. It was really very simple: we would have to move Bella, Thomas, and their livestock to my farm. I turned to Mattie, but before I could ask, she spoke.

"It's alright, Papa. It is what needs to be," was all she said.

Thomas made a weak attempt to argue that he would be fine on his own, but I could see the relief in his eyes when I first told him what I'd decided. I could see he was trying his best to be the man of the house, but that the burden was very heavy and wearing him down. Moving Bella was definitely a risk as the grippe had a strong hold on her, but I knew I had to do it before she woke, or she'd refuse and we'd all be back to where we started, and I couldn't have that, either. The proverbial rock and hard place. I had to choose the best for the whole family, not just one member, but I wasn't happy about it and I knew there would be hellfire when Bella woke. _If _she woke.

_I've never wished ill on anyone my entire life, but I have to admit it would be easier on us all, including her, if she passed in the night_.

The next morning, at first light, we finalized our preparations to leave Emmett's homestead for mine. Thomas and I foraged again for saplings to made a second sledge to hitch to his team. We'd decided to make several trips back and forth before trying to move Bella. If I was going to house them and their livestock for even a short duration, supplies would have to be brought as well. And, the more we traveled back and forth, the path would become beaten down, hopefully providing easier passage for our human cargo.

Thomas and I trudged back and forth all day carrying food and supplies while Mattie watched Bella. She'd refused broth when Thomas and Mattie tried to feed her, but she sipped for me as she had the night before when I tried at lunch time.

On our last trip, we brought Bella and Mattie. We had been extremely lucky, it had been a fair day with little wind, for which I was grateful. I dragged Samuel's old cot closer to the hearth and Mattie took care of settling Bella into bed so Thomas and I could look after the animals. It took all our efforts to get everyone settled in and the livestock bedded down for the night before dark.

Bella's condition remained unchanged for days. We all took turns keeping the fire going all hours. She refused any and all food offered by Thomas or Mattie, but she would part her lips and swallow for me.

Thomas and I spent the next several days making endless trips between the two houses, bringing wood, feed, and food from their farm to mine. We enlarged my barn by packing the snow into high walls, having nothing else to build with. Improvising, we used the wagon ribs and small trees to fashion a frame over which we stretched the canvas wagon covers to make a roof.

Suddenly, it was Christmas morning. In all the fuss, I'd forgotten, but the children hadn't. Mattie cooked all day, preparing a special feast, and I rooted out the long-forgotten package from town, bought all those months ago so my children and my wife would have something today. I sat on my bed with the curtain drawn for privacy.

I opened the paper parcel slowly, and let my fingers drift over the contents. A pretty shawl for Alice, a woolly scarf for Samuel, hair ribbons for the girls, a book or two, a small soft blanket for the baby, and a small bag of penny candy. I wasn't aware I was crying until a tear splashed against the brown paper. I let the sorrow wash over me for a minute, let myself feel my own sadness and grief at all I'd lost before I dried my tears and went to celebrate what I had left.

_Thomas could use a new scarf. His is tattered and full of holes. Mattie would be rich in hair ribbons now, not that she ever wears them anymore. Maybe I should hold onto those until her birthday in the spring..._

"Papa?" Mattie's soft, shy voice spoke from the other side of the curtain.

"Yes, baby girl."

"Are you all right? Do you need something?"

"No, sweetheart. I'm fine. Don't worry. I'll be out in just a minute. I bet supper is just about ready isn't it?"

"Yes, sir."

"It smells so good; I wouldn't miss it for the world."

I pulled a few things from the parcel, and tied the rest back into the brown paper before putting it back on the shelf over the bed. When I went back into the main room, Thomas was still outside, and Mattie was bent over the fire, so I quickly slipped the presents next to their plates on the table. Although Bella slept through Christmas, we did our best to include her in the festivities as we sang, danced, and played games around the table after dinner.

~ o ~

It was just before New Year's when Bella finally woke up. I had to hand it to her, she was a fighter, having lingered in a fevered delirium for over a week. The past couple of days, she'd been a little stronger, willing to take some gruel from me, and as I spooned a little bit into her mouth, she suddenly groaned.

"Emmmmmmmett?"

"No, Bella. It's Edward."

Her eyes fluttered open and she struggled to focus on my face.

"Emmmmmmett? Wh... where's..."

"He's not here, Bella." She weakly tried to rise, and couldn't even lift her head. "Please eat a little more gruel. You've been sick for a long time and you're very weak."

"B-b-but..."

"Shush now and eat. Rest. It will all make sense later, I promise." She was too weak to argue with me for once, and simply ate several more spoonfuls of gruel before drifting back to sleep. As I laid her back on the pillows, Thomas burst through the door with Mattie close at his heels.

"Ma! Ma!" he shouted. Her eyelids fluttered. "Mattie said you were awake!"

"Thomasssss," she murmured.

He quickly took my place at her bedside. She tried to open her eyes again, but she was too tired. Thomas took her hand and placed it on his cheek. "Ma, oh, Ma!" The tears began to overflow, and she managed a "shhhhh" before she slipped into unconsciousness.

"Noooo!" Thomas cried, sobbing into her chest.

"Quiet, son, she's just sleeping now. It's all right. Her fever seems to have broken in the night. She's not out of the woods just yet, but it's a good sign." I rested my hand on his shoulder and squeezed slightly. He just nodded and sniffed, wiping his nose and eyes on his sleeve, and I could suddenly see the little boy he'd been. "You stay here and keep your mother company. I'll take care of the livestock this morning. Don't you worry."

I caught Mattie's eyes and spoke to her with mine. We both silently bundled up and went outside to give Thomas some privacy with his mother. Mattie and I stayed outside for the rest of the morning. Once the animals had all been fed and watered, and their stalls mucked out, Mattie and I made snow people in the side yard. She "accidentally" shoved a handful of snow into my face and I pretended to be angry and chased her around as she squealed. Thomas came out to see what all the fuss was about, and a rowdy two-against-one snowball fight rapidly ensued. They pelted me with so many, I didn't stand a chance and called uncle once I was completely covered, trying to make the fun last. They turned on each other then and Mattie led him on a merry chase.

I knocked as much snow off of me as I could and entered the house still chuckling. I stripped off my outer garments, ready to warm myself and dry my damp clothes by the fire. When I turned around, Bella was awake and watching me.

"What's going on? Why am I here? I demand you take me home!" Her voice was unexpectedly strong.

I swallowed down my anger. "What's going on is my attempt to keep you alive. You are here so we can take care of you while you're ill. I refuse to take you home until you've recovered."

"Don't you take that tone with me. I am _not_ your wife or child."

_Thank God._

"No, you're not. But you _are_ my brother's wife, and I am duty-bound by a promise I made to him to take care of you. To protect you and your children as my own."

"I _insist_ you take me home."

"You are free to return home when you are well and strong enough to do so on your own. Until then, you and Thomas will remain here."

"But our livestock, our home..."

"Your livestock have been moved here where Thomas and I can look after them together. Your home will still be there when you return..."

The door slammed open, cutting me off. "Ma, Ma! You're awake!" Thomas made for the bed, still bundled up and covered in snow.

"Thomas! You naughty boy, you're getting snow all over the floor and this bed!" she reprimanded him, but I could hear her heart wasn't really in it. There was a softness in her voice I'd never heard before, tenderness for her son.

"I'm sorry, Ma." He sat up and removed his coat and scarf.

"Where'd you get that scarf? That's not yours."

"Uncle Edward gave it to me for Christmas. It's real warm. I've never had a new scarf before."

Bella looked at me and said nothing. Mattie had slipped in during all the ruckus, and she stood shyly at my side, clinging to me for reassurance.

"Baby girl, I'm starved. Can I help you get some lunch together?"

"No, Papa. It's all done. I left it warming on the hearth this morning," she whispered.

"Well, let's eat then. All that playing in the snow has made me hungry!" I tweaked her side and winked at her. It had been so long since I'd heard her laugh and squeal like the child she was. I hated to see that end so quickly because of our houseguest.

Thomas helped Bella eat some gruel mixed with stock from the stew Mattie had made. She wouldn't let him feed her, but he helped her raise her hand to her mouth as she clutched the spoon. Her strength and stubbornness constantly surprised me. Mattie and I sat at the table and ate in silence as usual. I tried unsuccessfully to make some small talk, but that was something I'd never been particularly good at.

Before light the next morning, I heard whispering in the main room. I shifted silently closer to the curtain and listened carefully. Bella was trying to convince Thomas to leave and return to their farm. Thomas didn't want to go, but he couldn't disobey his mother either. I ended the matter by rising and entering the main room, effectively cutting her off. Thomas made his escape to the barn.

To say I was angry was an understatement. I was livid. This stubborn woman was willing to jeopardize _everything_ I'd worked so hard to take care of and protect for nothing but foolish pride and willfulness. I'd never met anyone so selfish and self-centered in all my life.

"We're leaving _today_. Right after breakfast. Thomas is out preparing the horses."

"You are not. You're staying right here until I say otherwise."

"I refuse. You can't keep me or my son here. You have no right."

"Oh, woman. I have _every_ right to do with you as I see fit. Until now, I have respected your wishes over the wishes of my brother, and what I believe is right for all of us. That stops right here. _Right now_. I will _not_ allow you to jeopardize your health, and the health of everyone in this house because of your foolish pride!" I was shouting now. I never shouted. I never had to.

"Pride? _Pride?_ I can't _believe_ you have the gall to call me prideful when you're the one making decisions for everyone else! I _refuse_ to stay here and listen to this another minute!" And with that, she threw back the bedding and made to rise. She was too weak and wobbled, her knees starting to give out before she made it to the door.

"You are _not_ leaving!" I roared as she caught herself on the row of coats hanging by the door. "_Mattie!_"

"Yes, Papa?"

"Go to the barn and ask Thomas to bring me a lead rope. _Now_."

"Yes, Papa," she whispered and scurried out the door.

"You have caused me to lose my temper and shout at my daughter. Get back in bed. _This minute!_"

"And if I don't?"

"I will put you there forcibly."

"You would hold me here against my will."

"I would, and I will," I said moving towards where she stood against the wall, clinging to my coat. Thomas came in the door at that moment.

"Thomas. We're leaving. _Right now_. Help me." She reached for him, but before she could touch him, I bent forward, grasped her waist, and threw her over my shoulder. I turned and bypassed the cot by the hearth, carrying her to my bed in the corner. I threw her down on the corn husk mattress none too gently. Her eyes blazed into mine with defiance and surprising strength. She moved as if to rise again, and I held her down by her shoulder.

"Thomas, bring me the rope, son."

"Don't you _dare_, Thomas." She turned to me and slapped me across my face. "How _dare_you!Trying to turn _my_ son against _me_."

"Mattie, take the rope from Thomas." My voice was deadly calm now, my eyes never leaving Bella's. "Do it now... Do you have it?" She hummed in response. "Come here and hand it to me." I held out the hand furthest away from Bella and the bed. "Thank you, baby girl," I said gently when I felt the rope in my palm. The minute I began tying one end of the rope around Bella's wrist, she began to struggle in earnest, flailing against my body with unexpected strength given her recent weakened state. In frustration, I finally climbed onto the bed and pinned her down by straddling her torso. I made quick work of tying her arm to the bed, making sure the rope was not in contact with her skin or too tight. As I went to climb off her, I looked in her face, and she spit into mine.

"There, I think that settles the issue for now. You will remain tied here until you learn some manners, some gratitude, and to be a gracious guest. _In. My. Home_." I ground the last part out between clenched teeth.

When I looked up, the children were white with fear, their eyes as big as saucers. Neither had ever seen either Bella or I behave in such a manner. I, myself, was amazed at my own behavior.

_She pushed me too far._

I walked out of the silent house, taking my coat and hat with me. I went up to the rise and sat with Alice until nightfall. I had no idea, none at all, how I was going to handle myself or anything else when I went home.

~ o ~

A strained silence filled the next few weeks. I released Bella from the restraint the following morning. Even she had to admit defeat when she stepped out the door to leave and couldn't see her hand in front of her face. Blizzards raged endlessly outside, the snow piling higher than the roof.

Thomas, Mattie, and I made the best of it, playing games, reading to each other, practicing ciphers, spelling, and writing when we were not mending tack or making prairie grass twists to burn. Bella refused to join in, despite Thomas' repeated pleas. She kept to herself, sitting in the corner in Alice's rocker, staring into the fire. We simply ignored her after a while. It was like living with a ghost.

She would stir to life when Mattie would approach the fire to cook or make coffee. Bella moved automatically, almost like sleepwalking, revealing a lifetime spent cooking. I wondered if Mattie would be like that one day, and I fervently hoped not.

Our sod house was small, and there was only one real bed. Bella and I were forced to share it at night. I kept the curtain open to quash any impression of impropriety. Not that I could imagine kissing or touching Bella in that way. Even if she weren't so difficult, she'd been my brother's _wife_, and I had never thought of her as anything other than a sister. We faced away from each other in the small bed, taking care never to touch, even in sleep.

We passed the rest of the winter this way. Not touching, barely speaking, simply existing in the same small space together. Mattie and I did our best to give Thomas and Bella time and privacy alone together, but Bella never showed the same courtesy in return. I was relieved that she'd stopped fighting me, but I was worried about her listlessness as the weeks passed. It was as if the fire in her had been snuffed out that day she'd spent tied to the bed. She slowly began to join in with the daily chores over time, but remained silent, aloof, and distant.

I hadn't been able to visit Alice and the children since that frightful day because of the deep snow. I longed for her advice, her wisdom. I knew she would know what to do because she always did, especially when I didn't. I tried to talk to her when I was out getting wood or water a few times, but I seemed only able to feel her comfort when I was up on the rise.

Late one night, after the snow began to melt, I was roused by something. I lay still, listening to see what had awakened me. There was nothing but silence. Just as I was drifting back to sleep, I heard a soft noise beside me. I waited, listening again intently. The sound repeated, and I realized Bella was crying. I rolled over carefully, and started to speak before I realized she was still asleep.

_She's crying in her sleep._ I lay back onto the pillows staring up at the ceiling pondering this new information. I'd never seen Bella cry, ever. I didn't think she was capable of it.

Two days later, the sound of a rifle shot rolled across the melting snow to my ears where I was walking in the far field. My heart stopped at the sound, and I ran towards the soddy in dread.

_Oh, no! What has befallen us now?_

As I approached, I saw the first wisp of smoke rising into the air down by the river and changed direction. Cresting the edge of the bank, I stopped dead in my tracks stunned by the scene below me. Bella had built a small but raging fire and was dropping something in her hands into the blaze, my rifle lying discarded nearby. Mattie was standing stock still between us. I could tell she was frozen in fear. I strode past her, touching her gently on my way. As I approached, Bella dropped more brush on the fire, continuing to stoke it and keep it blazing.

"Bella?" I spoke softly, not wanting to startle her. She didn't immediately look up from the task before her. "Bella?" I tried again. She turned to me and captured my eyes with her fierce beauty. Her eyes were ablaze, hair loosened from its pins and blowing around her head, cheeks flushed, lips pressed into a thin red line.

"Mattie!" she yelled sharply. "I told you to go to the house! _Go. Now_." I turned to see my daughter running for home. I turned back to Bella and realized her whole body was shaking.

"Bella? Bella, what happened? What is it?" I looked down at the fire near her feet.

"A-a-a. . . A r-r-rac-c-c-oon," she stuttered, clearly struggling to speak. "A-a-a r-rabid r-rac-c-oon in-n the dug-gout."

_Oh. My. God._ "Mmmaa. . ." I couldn't get her name out.

"S-she's f-fine."

_Oh thank God. _I almost collapsed in relief. I looked up at Bella. "Are you. . ."

"I s-shot it b-before. . ." She wrapped her arms around her chest, and raised her eyes to the horizon, staring unseeingly before her. "I. . . I. . ." she swallowed hard. "I can't lose another one, not now." She spoke so softly, I almost didn't hear the words.

I unconsciously leaned forward in time to see a tear trickle slowly down her cheek. I raised my hand and hesitated, unsure of the correct action, and finally settled on touching her shoulder. Only after I squeezed lightly did she react by raising a hand and placing on top of mine. We stood there in silence until the fire died down, the carcass reduced to ash.

"You didn't touch it, did you?"

"No. Not with my bare hands. I used a rag."

The next morning, I put on a fresh pair of socks, and noticed that the holes in the toes had been mended. I looked at Mattie questioningly, and she cut her eyes towards Bella and then back to me.

_Huh. She darned my socks. That was nice. I didn't know she'd even noticed the holes._ I followed her lead and said nothing, though I gave her a shy smile when she handed me my morning coffee.

And just like that, the thaw began inside and outside the little sod shack on the edge of the prairie in earnest.

~ o ~

Soon enough, the rest of the snow melted, and the spring rains came. Thomas and I began plowing the fields as soon as the ground was soft and dry enough. Bella and Mattie would follow behind us, hoeing the seeds into the freshly tilled soil. I started with Alice's old garden, behind the barn, so that our food would begin to grow as we plowed and planted our crops.

Thomas was clearly better with animals than he was with farming, and he and I discussed possibly using most of their land for ranching. We had to cultivate at least part of their acreage, and needed to keep making improvements to both parcels for five years to make good on our homestead claims. It was a lot of land for two men and two women to tend, but Bella and Thomas were both adamant about holding on to Emmett's claim. I reluctantly agreed, and hoped we'd be able to find a sharecropper or tenant farmer willing to take on some of the load.

When we'd moved west the previous spring, our families were the only two out here. We had no neighbors for miles. As the weather warmed and April became May, more families arrived, looking for their own land to claim. One day, a Mr. Banner and his young son approached me as I was plowing in the field. On my last trip to town, I'd spread word that I was looking for a sharecropper or tenant farmer. Mr. Burns, at the general store, had sent Banner my way. He'd lost his wife and four of his five children on the journey, and just didn't have the heart or the strength to stake a claim. He planned to return home in the fall after the harvest came in.

I had him work with me for the week, and sent his son to work with Thomas. After seven days, there was no doubt he was a good fit, willing to work hard for a fair return. He and his son settled happily in Emmett's sod house, and they picked up tending the crops and fields. Thomas happily gave up his plow, and took part of the families' savings to buy a few calves and two promising yearling horses.

I went to visit Alice one day, and suddenly realized that a year had passed. _One down, four to go, and this land would be mine free and clear_. The visit was sad as always, but the thought was liberating and I entered the soddy with a whistle on my lips that night. Bella looked up with a warm smile at the sound, and I couldn't help but smile back. _Her smile really lights up her eyes. How did I not notice that before?_

That night, I dreamed of Alice.

_It was the first night we'd slept on the land since I'd filed the claim. The first night on what would be _our_ land. We couldn't stop smiling, and once the children were asleep, we couldn't keep our hands off each other. We made love quickly and passionately rolling on the ground just out of earshot of the children for privacy. We returned to camp disheveled and giggling like children._

_Once we lay down by the dying campfire, sleep settled over us quickly. Later, in the dark of night, I roused slightly, cold, and reached beside me for my warm wife. I snaked my arm around her waist and drew her to me, pressing her back into my chest._

"_Mmmmmm. . . warm. . . ." I sighed into her hair. It was so soft and she felt so good in my arms. I vaguely heard her soft sigh as she snuggled back into my body, resting her arm on top of mine and twining our fingers together. "Mmmmmm. . . feels good," I sleepily nuzzled the back of her neck, feeling myself harden between us. She hummed softly in response and pressed against me further. I groaned quietly, waking a little more, and moved my lips to the side of her neck, rocking my hips against her gently. She moaned a little louder; her hand reached back and stroked my thigh. _

_I was almost awake now, and I rolled Alice to her back, my lips seeking hers in the darkness. Her name on my lips, I pressed our bodies together and kissed her. . . ._

I jerked awake and pulled back from the warm body below mine. _What in tarnation!_ I was half asleep and confused, but it was definitely _not_ Alice in my arms. I lurched back across the bed frantically. "Bella! I'm sorry! I was. . . I was dreaming. . . ." I rubbed my hand over my face and into my hair horrified at my own behavior.

_This is bad, this is _real_ bad. She's _Emmett's wife_ for goodness sakes, not _yours_. Oh God. . . ._

"Mmmmm. . . Edward? What's wrong?" Bella's voice jarred me out of my thoughts. "Did you have a nightmare?"

_You could say that._ "Um, yeah, I uh. . . . I'm sorry I woke you."

"Well, it was only a dream. Go back to sleep." She sighed and rolled over, drifting back to sleep.

_I may never sleep again. Thank God she didn't wake up in the middle of my assault. _I didn't want to think about what might have happened if she had_._ I lay back on the pillows finally, and remained awake the rest of the night.

~ o ~

I did my best to keep my distance from Bella after that, but she didn't make it easy. She'd come to the field to bring me a cool drink of water, or tuck an extra slice of pie in the lunch basket she sent with Mattie. There were no more holes in my clothes, each one carefully mended. She started to lightly touch my shoulder when she passed me at the table, and I began to look forward to coming home at night.

Her small touches and gestures increased as spring turned to summer, and my resistance continued to fade. I'd let my fingers brush hers sometimes when she handed me something to drink. Every so often, I'd catch a glimpse of her hair cascading loose down her back as she brushed it before bed. It looked so soft, and I found myself wanting to run my fingers through it. And, I woke more than once to find that we'd turned towards each other in sleep, our feet or hands touching, or our legs occasionally entwined. I didn't know what to do about any of this, so I did nothing and remained silent.

She'd become sweet and shy — like a young girl — I'd never seen this side of her. And it wasn't just me. She would carefully brush Mattie's hair each morning and evening, dressing her braids with pretty ribbons. They would giggle together sharing secrets only women knew. I loved watching my daughter bloom under her attention. Mattie had never been much given to feminine frills and such, but she was now on the cusp on womanhood, and was ready to leave some of the tomboy behind.

A grand picnic was planned in celebration of my birthday even the Banners were invited to join us. The crops were in the ground and growing well, livestock healthy and thriving, and it seemed that the sadness was behind us, a fragile happiness settling over us all.

We wandered out into the tall grass fields under a brilliant blue sky to spread our blankets on the ground. After the feast, the children ran circles around us, playing some mysterious game known only to them. Mr. Banner excused himself and headed for home, letting his boy stay and play. It was so rare that there was time to sit like this, for the children to play and be children, and I was having a hard time relaxing.

Bella reached over and lightly rubbed my back, sensing my tension, our eyes glued to the joy running loose in the field in front of us.

"I miss them," she suddenly said quietly. I didn't have to ask whom.

"I miss them, too," I murmured back.

"I never thought that Emmett would go first. I was so mad at him when he died and took Matthew and Mark with him." She looked down to her lap and sighed. "I never wanted to come here. This was his dream, not mine. And now I'm here, and he's gone."

I took her hand. "I know, and I'm sorry. I knew you were out-voted when we all decided to travel west. It's beautiful here, but I honestly don't know if I'd have agreed to come if I'd have known what was going to happen."

She caught my eyes and held my gaze, the warmth radiating from them surprising me. "I have something for you, for your birthday."

"You didn't have to. . . ."

"I know. I wanted to. You've done so much for me, for Thomas. This is my way of thanking you. I'm not good with words, you know. That was Emmett's job."

"Yeah? He did that for me, too." I smiled.

"I know." She smiled sweetly and reached into her basket, withdrawing a folded bit of fabric that she handed to me.

I looked closer at the fabric in my hands and realized it was store bought, not homespun. And it wasn't just a piece of fabric, it was a shirt, sewn for me by hand. Her hands.

_When did she. . . ._ "When did you. . . ."

"Sometimes when you were in the fields for the day and I could sneak a little time away from my chores. Mostly late at night when you were sleeping. You snore, you know." She nudged my shoulder with her own, her smile widening.

I couldn't believe she'd given up sleep to sew me a shirt as a surprise and a thank you. I looked earnestly into her eyes, and saw truth, love, and gratitude there. "Thank you, Bella. It's very handsome. I will wear it with pride. Thank you." I hoped my eyes reflected my sincerity. My hand reached out of its own accord, and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

"Edward, you have been nothing but attentive, thoughtful, or gentle with me. I was awful to you, and you took care of me anyway. You rescued me from my own stubbornness when I was sick and wanted to die. You gave me space and patience when I was living but dead inside. And you were like the gentle warm rain of spring and the sunshine when I decided to live again. Thank you."

Her eyes burned into mine with sincerity and something more. She touched my cheek. "I don't expect anything from you, Edward. I know how much you loved Alice, and I know you could never love me like that. I'm happy with the life we have, but I want you to know that there could be more, if you wanted." She broke her gaze away at the end, afraid of what she might see in my eyes.

"Bella," I said softly, reaching for her chin, making her eyes meet mine. "You're right, I could never love another like I loved Alice, just as you could never love another like you loved Emmett. I've tried to keep space and distance between us as was proper, but you've continued to reach for me and let me see how beautiful you are. We're so alike – I never knew that before – we fit together easy and you've made my life so simple." I looked down as I felt the heat rise in my face. "I try not to think of those things with you. I never thought you'd see me that way." I smiled sheepishly as I looked up and met her eyes.

My hand moved to cup her cheek, my thumb running across the soft skin over her cheek bone. She leaned into my hand.

"So beautiful," I murmured in amazement.

Slowly, looking into her eyes for permission, for any sign of hesitation, I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers. They were warm and soft and welcoming. I sighed into her mouth and she moaned softly into mine. I pulled back to look at her.

"I don't know what to do now," I admitted. "At one time, I'd have courted you, but now. . . ."

"Now, we've been living in the same tiny house, sharing and building a life together. We've spent all this time getting to know each other. . . ."

"But, you're _not_ my wife; you're my _brother's_ wife."

"My marriage vow ended with Emmett's death, though my love for him lives on."

I realized then that I still considered myself to be married to Alice. But Alice was dead, and we were now parted. I thought about my life with Alice. My life after Alice. My life with Bella. They were different, as if I was living another life, a second life. I had never thought there would be another for me after Alice, but now I wasn't so sure. Bella and I weren't perfect, life had broken each of us, but in the breaking, we were reformed to fit perfectly together.

"Will you excuse me please, Bella? There's something I need to do."

Surprise flashed in her eyes, but she nodded her assent, and I kissed her forehead before I rose. "Thank you for the very special birthday picnic. Shall I help you pack things up?" She shook her head. "Okay, then I'll see you back at the house for supper." I turned and walked away quickly.

I had intended to go straight to the rise, but my feet took me on a rambling journey around the farm instead. Memories old and new flooded my mind, bringing both tears and laughter. I finally strode onto the rise when the sun was lowering in the sky. I sat down on the warm earth and shared all my thoughts, dreams, and memories with Alice and our children. I told them that I loved them and that no one could ever take their place.

Then, with tears streaming unchecked down my cheeks, I admitted my attraction and growing feelings for Bella. I told Alice of my internal struggles and how I had still felt married to her, but now I understood that our vows ended with her death. I told her I would still visit, but that I wouldn't be coming as often anymore. I laid it all out for her, holding nothing back. When I was done, I pressed my hands and lips to her grave gently, lovingly. "Goodbye, Alice," I whispered and rose, lighter in heart and spirit and headed down the hill towards home.

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**The next and final chapter will post in approximately 2 weeks :-)**

**The Foxy Fics compilation benefitting The Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson's Research is now available. I've extended my popular o/s I Burn for You Gladly by one chapter especially for this worthy cause. Look for chapter 1 of this story to post on Twilighted during March 2011. Chapter 2 will ONLY be available in the foxyfics compilation. There are 39 authors contributing work, including tara sue me, so it's well worth the $5 minimum donation. Go to ./** **for all the details.**

**Also, an early heads up – I am writing a new piece for the FGB Fundraiser for Autism Awareness coming April 2011.**


	3. Chapter 3: A New Life

**My Brother's Wife – Chapter 3 – A New Life**

**A/N: What can I say about my beta, LJ Summers, that I haven't already said? Only that she's simply the best! This chapter's for you, bb! Mwah!**

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It was nearly dark by the time I reached the soddy, and though I knew the evening chores were complete, I had to check things myself, or I would never be able to sleep. I was out between the brush-fenced corral and the garden when I felt her behind me.

"Is everything all right? The children?"

"Fine, fine. We're all fine. Are you?" She stepped out of the darkness.

"Yes, I'm just checking things before sleep."

"You're very careful and thorough about things," she spoke softly and moved to my side.

"Yes."

Not looking at me, she murmured, "Emmett wasn't."

"No, not particularly." I looked down at her and realized the neck of her dress was unbuttoned, her hair hanging in a long braid down her back. When she looked up at me, her face glowed in the moonlight.

My breath caught in my throat. I had never seen her look so lovely. I reached for her face and, "Stunning" slipped through my lips. I couldn't look away. I was captivated. I realized I had felt that way for a long time, and I froze slightly in shock. Her face moved towards mine and then she was kissing me. Not soft, tenderly and chastely like this afternoon at the picnic. This kiss was passionate, lustful, and took my breath away.

One hand around my waist, the other in my hair, she drew me closer. My hands plunged into her hair at long last, holding her lips to mine. My hands loosened her hair from its braid before the fire in our kiss had me crushing her body to mine.

She broke her lips from mine and began nibbling along my neck. I groaned as she began unbuttoning her dress.

_Wait. . . Slow down. . . ._

"Bella. . ." I hissed, going to reach for her hands to stop her, slow her down. She cut me off by pressing her mouth to mine, and brought my hands to her breasts.

_I. . . I. . . Oh, God. . . oh. . . so. . . _"Amazing. . ." I sighed into her mouth. Her breasts were large, something I had tried not to notice long ago. Each was more than a handful. They were soft and glorious though they sagged from nursing her babies. I lifted and caressed them worshipfully.

I pulled away from her kiss to drop my mouth to her breasts only to discover that she had finished unbuttoning her dress, giving me full access. I pushed her it open and captured her nipple with my mouth through her thin chemise.

_So large. . . so. . . hard. . . ._ I licked and sucked her tender firm flesh, creating a wet spot on her undergarment. When I pulled back slightly the fabric was translucent and clung to her dark nipple and large aureole erotically. I had been hard before, but was pulsing almost painfully at the sight.

_Oh, we need to stop now. I. . . this. . . we shouldn't. . . ._

My thoughts were interrupted by her hand touching me. She lightly traced the outline of my hardness through my trousers before grasping me firmly through the fabric.

_Ah, God!_ My eyes rolled up into my head for a flash before I crashed my lips to hers, my tongue meeting hers for the first time. Her hands went to my shoulders and slid my suspenders down my arms before unbuttoning my pants. With nothing left to hold them up, they dropped straight to the ground around my feet. Her hands disappeared behind her back and I felt her dress drop to the ground as well.

I started to lower us but got tangled in my pants, and we tumbled to the ground laughing breathlessly. The grass was soft and damp with dew underneath us. _Should we go in the barn. . . ._ My thought was interrupted by her hand slipping under my shirttail and grasping me, stroking firmly.

"No drawers?" She arched her brow.

"Too hot this time of year," I smirked in response. My hand glided up her leg encountering only bare flesh. "I could ask you the same thing," I quirked my own brow in imitation.

"Less layers for you to have to fight through."

I realized then she had removed her petticoats as well. Bella held my gaze as she guided me unhesitatingly to her entrance, my tip cloaked in her warmth.

"You're sure about this then."

"I am."

I took a deep breath and blew it out my nose. _Who am I to deny a lady? _"Well, all right then." I pushed forward and slid myself deep inside her. She was not tight, four children had seen to that, but she was soft and velvety and warm nonetheless. Being inside her was heavenly, and I couldn't stop the loud groan that left my lips.

I began slowly drawing myself all the way out before plunging back into her depths. Our moans, groans and sighs were loud across each other's skin. As her hips started to meet mine stroke for stroke, her hands found my bottom and urged me silently to move faster, harder, deeper.

_So earthy, so lustful, so. . . wanton. . . ._ I was not going to last long at this pace, and dropped my forehead to her shoulder to concentrate.

"I can't. . . I won't. . ." I panted.

"I won't. . . either," she gasped, and suddenly arched, crying out softly in the still night air, writhing beneath me as she rode out her bliss. I raised my head slightly and clenched my teeth. I could feel the pressure building in me, about to crest. I moaned deep in my throat, and I felt her head rise off the ground. Her tongue licked the curve of my shoulder, and then she sunk her teeth firmly into my flesh. I cried out and came violently, pumping hard and emptying into her.

I carefully slumped upon her chest, heart pounding, panting hard. _Oh my God. What did we just do?_ I raised up on one elbow enough to look into her shining eyes. She reached up and touched my cheek. I bent my head and kissed her, still trying to catch my breath. I went to move off of her, but she held me fast.

"I'm not too heavy?"

She laughed lightly, "No, not at all. I like the feel of you laying on me like this. I feel safe, protected."

"My God, woman. You're a continual surprise."

She laughed again and pulled me down for a deep, passionate kiss. I finally broke the kiss to pull back and look at her, caressing her face with the backs of my fingers.

Bella had been my brother's wife, but he was dead and gone. Bella and I had never much liked each other, but something had changed between us after the long winter. This glorious, strong, fierce, passionate woman had chosen me, wanted me, and I had just made her mine. I cared about her but I didn't love her, not yet anyway, and I wanted her again. Right now. _Oh God, what have I done? What am I doing?_

I threw one final plea heavenward, to whom, I wasn't quite sure. _Please forgive me_. And I buried my lips in the curve of her neck, began thrusting my hips slowly, and groaned, "Oh, Bella," against her skin.

~ o ~

The next morning found us shy with each other. By some unspoken agreement, we kept to our previous behavior, not wanting the children to know about the change in our relationship. I couldn't help but notice the lovely blush coloring her cheeks and the way she quietly hummed while serving breakfast. To stop staring at her, I lowered my eyes to the table and kept them there throughout the rest of the meal.

The work of a farm is endless, and as the days passed and the crops grew, our small private gestures continued. Sometimes, I'd hide a flower on her pillow when she was down at the river doing the wash. Or I'd slip down to the river and bring back the morning water when I was up extra early, a chore she normally did. On her part, she made the effort to fix me my favorite foods for supper or something fresh and delicious from her garden I'd not had before.

Earlier in the spring, when I went to town for supplies, she had asked me to get some additional seeds for her garden, things Alice hadn't grown. Bella's garden grew lush, abundant vegetables and fruit from her loving attention and care. Our larder would be full this winter with all the canning and jarring she and Mattie did throughout the long summer days.

After our night of love-making under the stars, as we tried to keep that part of our relations secret, Bella and I would meet after the children were asleep either in her garden, by the corral, or in the barn to merge and meld our bodies into one. Again, with no discussion, we came up with ways of signaling the other that we wanted to connect that night and where.

One Sunday, Mattie and I went to visit Alice and the children on the rise. She clutched a handful of wildflowers for the graves as we walked up the hill.

"Papa?"

"Yes, baby girl?"

"You can make Bella my new Ma, if'n you want. I don't mind. She's nice now."

I was speechless for a minute and she slipped her hand into mine. "Why thank you, baby girl," was all I finally said in reply. She nodded her head and we reached the summit at that moment, and nothing further was spoken.

~ o ~

The green of summer turned into autumn gold and harvest time neared. Several of us men on neighboring farms formed a sort of collective agreement whereby we would all help harvest each others' farms in turn as so much work had to happen in such a short time.

As I was checking the harnesses and wagon in preparation for the first day of harvest on a neighboring farm one night, Thomas appeared at my side. He cleared his throat nervously.

"Um, Uncle Edward? I'd like to speak to you, you know, man to man?"

"Certainly, Thomas." I turned to him. He'd grown several inches over the summer and was now as tall as I. "What can I do for you?"

His eyes darted all around the barn while avoiding mine completely. "Well, um. . . ." He removed his hat and scratched his head. The held the hat by the brim and turned it around and around in his hands while looking at his boots. Having trouble myself sometimes with words, I waited patiently.

He stopped fiddling with his hat, took a deep breath, squared his shoulders a bit, and raised his head, finally looking me in the eye.

"Well, Uncle Edward, it's like this. I know you and Ma have been getting along better, and, well, if you want to marry her, that's fine by me."

You could have knocked me over with a feather. That was the last thing I ever expected him to say. I realized my mouth was hanging open in shock and snapped it closed. Now it was my turn not to look him in the eye and fidget.

"Ah. . . um. . . . Thank you, Thomas," I finally managed to croak out. He clapped me on my shoulder, nodded, put his hat on and left me standing there stunned.

_Does he know? Surely not. We've been so careful. But why. . . . Did she say something to him? _

I couldn't even form a clear thought and turned to brush Old Jack, finding the familiar act comforting. Lost in the task and in my circling thoughts, more time passed than I realized, and Bella came to find me. She was so quiet in her approach that I wasn't aware of her presence until our other horse, Joe, nickered to her.

"Sweetheart? What's wrong?" she asked softly, stepping to my side and taking the curry brush from my hand.

"Who said anything's wrong?"

"Well, you missed supper, and I've just watched you brush the same spot on Joe's shoulder for the last five minutes. That's not like you."

"Oh, I was just thinkin' I guess." I looked down at my scuffed and muddy boots.

"About what?" She stroked soothing small circles on my back.

"I. . . well. . . um. . . ." Resting my hand on Joe's withers, I half-urned to her. "I. . . I think Thomas knows about us. He just gave me permission to marry you. Did you. . . ."

Her laughter cut me off. She started off trying to stifle her merry laugh, but gave up, threw her head back and began to loudly guffaw holding onto her stomach.

"I'm sorry. . ." she gasped before starting laughing again. Now she bent forward and slapped her thigh.

"Well, I'm so glad I could provide you such merry entertainment this evening." Pulling a face, I turned away.

"Wait. . . sorry. . . ." I felt her hand on my arm and turned back. Bella dried her eyes on her sleeve still gasping for breath. "I'm sorry, Edward, but your face. . . your expression. . . ." she trailed off into a fit of giggles.

I frowned. "I fail to see what's so funny here."

Swallowing her laughter but not her smile, Bella took a step toward me and placed her hands on my upper arms.

"Oh, sweetheart, sometimes you miss so much, trapped in that sweet, thoughtful head of yours!"

"What do you mean? What have I missed?" Insulted, I crossed my arms across my chest, but her hands remained on me.

"I know you think you're subtle and that you're fooling the children, but they're smarter and more observant that you give them credit for. They've known for some time that there's something more between us."

"What?" I was momentarily appalled – this was _not_ the example I wanted to provide for my children.

She stroked my arms until I uncrossed them, and then took my hands in hers. "Mattie told me back in the summer that she hoped I'd be her Ma one day soon. And Thomas mentioned hearing noises one night in the barn recently. I'm afraid Emmett was never particularly quiet, and I'm sure Thomas recognized what he heard."

At hearing this, I put my head in my hands. "We have to stop, then Bella. This is not the example to provide for our children. Some would consider us married already, since we've been living in the same house for some time now and weddings are rare here, but what we're doing is sinful. I should have stopped it long ago, I'm sorry I wasn't stronger."

"Edward! We're two grown people. I wanted you. I wanted this. I'm _not_ sorry or ashamed of what we have. I love you and have for a long time now. We live like man and wife, and we treat each other like husband and wife. Intimate relations are just a part of that."

"You're sure? But what about the children?"

"What about them? They see the love we have for each other. That we treat each other with respect and work together as a team. What better example can you have? My Pa beat my Ma regularly after they would fight and yell at each other. It took me years after we were married to know that Emmett wouldn't raise a finger to me in anger. My folks were married in the eyes of God and the state, but they were terrible examples for me and my brothers and sisters."

My heart melted at her words. I had never known such treatment and I didn't know she came from people like that. "Oh my darling," I said, folding her into my arms. "I had no idea that your people were like that. I'm sorry you saw such harsh treatment between your ma and pa. No one should see or hear that."

"Now do you understand why I'm not as concerned about our example to our children? Besides, I think we've lived together long enough that most would call us married."

"True. But without a preacher or a Justice of the Peace, it's not married to me. I guess it's time to make an honest woman of you, eh?" I squeezed her playfully.

"Such a romantic proposal. How can I refuse?" She tickled me back. "Besides, it probably is best that we stand in front of the preacher and make our vow soon, before the baby comes." Her sparkling eyes met mine through her lashes.

"Baby comes? What baby? Whose baby?"

She slapped my chest lightly. "You really are at sea sometimes, aren't you? Silly, silly man, _our_ baby."

_Our baby? _Our_ baby? _

My mind struggled to grab this information. "_Our _baby?" I gasped in disbelief. "Are you sure? Wait, are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm sure," she laughed. "And I'm fine. Everything is as it usually is. This isn't the first time, you know." She winked and nudged me.

"Wha. . . when?"

"Best I can figure, late winter or early spring."

"Whoooooooop!" I hollered and picked her up, swinging her around.

"You're happy, then?"

"Yes, yes! I'm just still a little stunned. I wasn't expecting any of this."

"But it's okay? You're okay with it?"

"Yes! A new life! A new _child_. . . ." My voice trailed away as I looked down into her shining face.

_My God, I love this woman. Not just love her. I love her love her. Like with all my heart. I'm in love with Bella! I don't know exactly when that happened. And now we're going to be married and have a child. . . ._

So many emotions were running through me that I wasn't sure I could contain them all. My heart swelled so I thought my chest would burst, my eyes burned with unshed tears, my body shook with joy and excitement. I saw all the same things reflected back to me in Bella's eyes, and I raised my hand to cup her cheek tenderly.

"I love you, Bella," I whispered for the first time before pressing my lips to hers softly. Pulling back slightly, I brought my other hand to her face to cradle it between them. Her deep eyes were radiant, and captured mine completely. I wanted to marry her. I never thought I'd ever feel that way about a woman again. But I did. I wanted to marry her and raise our children on this land together.

"Will you marry me?" Popped out of my mouth unbidden.

"Yes, yes of course I'll marry you!" She answered before I could draw breath, then crashed her lips to mine, hungry, needy. My own body responded and we didn't even bother to fully undress before I was engulfed deep inside her and groaning out my love.

~ o ~

We celebrated a record harvest that fall. Mr. Banner decided to stay on and it was a relief not to have to find a replacement – he was a hard worker and had become a good friend and neighbor. I never had to worry about Emmett's homestead with him in charge. While I might have been unaware of many things, I did see how my Mattie took a shine to his boy Ben, and he seemed equally sweet on her. I wouldn't be at all surprised if they started courting down the road a piece.

Thomas shone working with all our livestock, and we butchered a yearling calf after the first frost to give us meat for the winter. Several calves and foals were due in the spring, the heifers and mares he'd bought and bred were fat and happy in their shaggy winter coats.

Our food secure and plentiful, our livestock healthy and doing well, our farm bedded down for the winter, I took stock of my life as I headed up to the rise one evening. The sun was low in the sky coloring everything in warm reds and golds.

_Two years. I've been on this land for two years. Only three to go. _

Had anyone told me a year ago that I'd be married again and expecting a new child, I'd have laughed in their face. Life on the prairie was tough and had taken a toll on my body and my spirit, but I refused to be beaten, bending instead with the wind like the long grasses that surrounded me as far as the eye could see.

I felt warm arms wrap around my waist as Bella snuggled into my side. Putting one arm around her back while spreading my other across her expanding belly, I kissed the top of her head and sighed in contentment.

"It's so beautiful up here," she said softly.

"Yes."

"I love the way the land stretches away to the horizon all around."

I nodded and turned to face my love, my wife, and kissed her soundly.

"You still miss them." It was a statement, not a question.

"Yes, but not like before. The memories now are more sweet than bitter."

She nodded in agreement against my chest.

"You, too?"

"Yes. You, the children, you're my life now."

Nodding my understanding, I kissed her forehead lightly. "What's here was my life once upon a time. Now it's my past." I grabbed my wife's hand. "Let's go home. That's where my life is – the life I love and live fully with you and our children, and our children yet to come."

We walked together downhill towards home. Our home. The sunset gilded the land and glinted off the rings on our hands. Happily ever after was for storybooks and dreams. Life was hard and unrelenting on the prairie, I'd learned through painful experience, but I knew I'd never been happier or more settled in my life before. And I knew I'd be that way to the end of my days with the incredible woman who walked by my side into the fading light. The day might be ending, but our life together was truly just beginning.

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_The End_

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**A/N: I hope you enjoyed this concluding chapter. It wasn't an easy journey and I thank you for trusting me and sticking with this story through to the end.**

**I've set up a fledgling author's blog at: http:/ mostlyalurker (dot) blogspot (dot) com/ Please stop by when you've a moment to check out my new digs. I've contributed a new stand alone o/s for the FGB Autism Awareness compilation coming out in April 2011. A teaser and other information is posted there for your reading and donation pleasure.**

**Your support of me means so much. Thank you,  
Mal 3**


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